*____don't worry, i'm watching over you___

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

sleepless nights

it really feels terrible to sleep so little everyday.
and get up so early in the morning. today is around six thirty.
today I suddenly woke up at 4.22am, yesterday was 4.45am, and the day before was 4.55.am.
and the next time waking up is already six
and its no wonder that

-headache is always there
-acne's getting worse
-heavy eyebags hanging on my eye
-cui-ness getting severe by the day
-fear gets the grip of me

and dont even mention about how I feel each time I wake up with a dream, then to realise, its fake and it seemed so real. man, I just need someone to tell me, its oki. frowns*

my heart and my soul
I give you control
consume me from the inside out Lord
Let justice and praise
become my embrace
to love you from the inside out

everlasting your light will shine when all else fades
never ending
your glory goes beyond all things
and the cry of my heart is to bring you praise
from the inside out ofmy soul cries out from
the inside out of my soul

and this shall be the song in my night when I cant sleep becuase I believe, praise is the most beautiful, in times of adversity. thankyou daddy God :)

hoonhoon loves you yeshu!

what'ever that it the cause of it, I pray that daddy God will just heal me and let me recover because i just need so much sleep. and can you believe it ? I am actually someone who take take two afternoon naps a day and I need around 16 hours of sleep everyday and now Im getting 3-4 hours of sleep everyday and with my so very pack de schedule, I'll get sick very soon and I just dont wante another round of seeing doctor straight five times in a month. and my low blood is getting worse by teh day. just yesterday, went out of the school with my school de LC play de people and when we were coming back, we need to climb a long flight of stairs before we can reach teh over-head bridge of our school. yes, I did, but I felt so breathless that I couldnt talk. I took deep breath but no useless. I rested but couldnt breath in or out any air. why like that?

Im freaking irritated with myself.
Lesser and lesser patience for myself.
God, why am I like this?

and God let me speak with werds that build people up and not ear them down. sorry if I have in any way, grieved your Holy Spirit :(

ar, how bad to start my day
boo.
emo-ish day
:(
I dont feel like going out

nvm. stay home is good. going ddown church later to see my dear pastor mark anyway.
in the weeks ahead, aso many thigns are gonna happen and number one on list is

-school choir performance at alumni lounge
-AS school LC play at OTC
-church good friday musical

all at one go, time is confirmed gonna clash somehow. and its time to prioritise time again.
I must be really sad. somehow I figure out that in this post, after typing for like so long, theres not even a single bit of this "LOL". heavy eyebags=heavy heart you see
nvm, its oki. I think school is gonna be so crazy for me. I have like LC play from 9-5pm and then choir pactise at 5-10pm. no break?? and in addition to my suddenly wake up in the middle of the night, I think Im so gonna fall sick soonish soon soon. nvm. its okie. its easy to forget someone too. yup, talk less and be occupied. be so very de occupied.

and now my number on the list is to start doing quiet time. havent been doig and am guilty of it is because Im really so tired and drained out, so much so that I fell asleep everywhere that I go.

I love the chiense song by jaychou 甜甜的and退后
reminds me of teh cute mingjay with me singing and acting cute. LOL
mingjay, where is your gay partner chia chia? and your dear dear kok kian? LOL
I miss you guys! :)
go out someday oki??

and jaychou look so cute singing the song tian tian de. LOL
cute song. I like! so very de much de lor. LOL

went to meet pastormark and pastor tay just now. and I guess, everything is fine now :)

and she goes "its okie, its alright, alice alice fight fight fight!"

flew into your heart at [4:44 PM]

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